Saturday, June 04, 2005

 

Lawyers in Space

Believe it or not, there is something called the "Outer Space Treaty." The U.S signed the treaty, agreeing to the peaceful use of outer space, in January 1967. In other words, the only part of the entire Universe the U.S. intends to militarize is the middle atmosphere, the lower atmosphere, mountains, deserts, swamps, highlands, lowlands, flatlands, tundra, icecaps, icebergs, islands, oceans, seas, lakes, rivers, cities, towns, villages, and possibly the interior, of one little planet. But the crazy give-peace-a-chance kooks don't like to talk about that, do they?

Of course, the treaty did not mean the U.S. could not continue a militarily manned space station well past the date the OST was signed. As far as you know, that program ended in 1969. Two space suits from the program were recently discovered. One was for "Lawyer" and one was for "007." That is what is so sad about signing these treaties -- secret agents need to consult a lawyer before they can even fire the space laser, much less activate the Death Star. The lawyer's code name was "Richard Lawyer," since everyone was going to call him "Dick" anyway.



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