Andromeda

Following the astounding success of our pro-Darwin protest, Andromeda is sensing its own raw power in the scientific community. Naturally, this leads us to form our own organization to challenge the silliness of scientists who we think are silly. Accordingly, we announce today the formation of the Union of Unconcerned Scientists. While we largely agree with everything the Union of Concerned Scientists says, we -- with our broader perspective -- take a much more relaxed attitude.

For example, today the UCS whined:

Today's failed anti-missile test, the second in a row in which the interceptor never left its silo, highlights a key problem with the Bush administration's misguided anti-missile program.

In response, the UUS says, "Relax, dude, it's no big deal! Who among us hasn't had a Viagra-challenged missile system at one time or another? The missiles will come out eventually, when they're ready."

The UUS will also soon be releasing its official report "Global Warming: Come On, People, Just Roll With It." However, we regret to advise that release of the brochure entitled "Marijuana: Dangerous Gateway Drug or ... What Were We Talking About?" has been delayed yet again.