Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Breaking News: Avoiding the Catastrophe
Breaking News! We have found a way to escape the imminent collision between Andromeda and the Milky Way! We simply have to get our Sun to dive for the galactic center and use the "gravitational sling-shot" to escape the galaxy before Andromeda hits. Hooray!
True, the rocket power needed to get the Sun to suddenly dive toward the galactic center would be extraoardinarily costly. Just finding the right type of oven mitts to use when attaching those rockets to the Sun is estimated to cost well over a thousand dollars. And, true, passing through the galactic center would likely burn our entire planet into an ionized gas that would then be sucked into the black hole at the center of the galaxy and, as we went in, we would get all stretchy like that dude in "The Scream" who looks like that kid in "Home Alone" putting on after-shave. But just because it's incredibly expensive to do and, if done, unlikely to succeed, that's no reason not to try!
True, the rocket power needed to get the Sun to suddenly dive toward the galactic center would be extraoardinarily costly. Just finding the right type of oven mitts to use when attaching those rockets to the Sun is estimated to cost well over a thousand dollars. And, true, passing through the galactic center would likely burn our entire planet into an ionized gas that would then be sucked into the black hole at the center of the galaxy and, as we went in, we would get all stretchy like that dude in "The Scream" who looks like that kid in "Home Alone" putting on after-shave. But just because it's incredibly expensive to do and, if done, unlikely to succeed, that's no reason not to try!
