Andromeda

As long-time readers know, Andromeda Blog was compelled to disconnect hit-counting after Site Meter's computers cried out in anguish, and we were forced to turn off BlogAds because we were making too much money (we had to fire several staffers just to make room for it all). But at the risk of causing the wires holding the Internets together to burst into flame from all the traffic to this site, Andromeda must wade into the Juan Cole vs. Jonah Goldberg dispute.

It began when the National Review's Jonah Goldberg called the University of Michigan's Juan Cole a poopy head:

Consider Juan Cole. You probably haven't heard of him, but he's the dashboard saint of lefty Middle East experts. President-elect of the Middle East Studies Association, Cole has made a new career for himself in finding the dark lining of every silver cloud.

This may or may not be true. While early returns indicated he was leading the election, the exit polls were contradictory, and we feel it is far too early to declare anyone President-elect. (We feel the same way about the 2004 U.S. Presidential Election.) Regardless, Prof. Cole chose to respond. He was supported by James Wolcott. And Atrios. Then a hot chick in a Johnny Cash t-shirt. Mr. Goldberg rallied his supporters at the Corner. The war had begun!

Here at Andromeda, we have always had our doubts about Prof. Cole. For one thing, why is his name "Juan" if he's a Middle-East expert? For another, couldn't he change his name to meet our expectations, and how much does something like that cost anyway? Third and most importantly, are we only allowed to have one dashboard saint? Because we have several, including Ganesh, Siva, J.C., and Buddha, plus some Mighty Morphin Power Rangers glued into provocative poses. And fourth, we kind of like "Cody," or possibly "Dylan."

But what of this Jonah Goldberg? Andromeda has had doubts about Mr. Goldberg, too. But then he points out that:

One very illuminating element is that for all of Cole's alleged scholarly brilliance, the people who take his side seem almost completely unconcerned with the substance of any of this. It's all personal insults. Then again, considering Cole's original post, the fish rots from the head down.

And we must admit it is true that, for all Cole's alleged scholarly brilliance, Andromeda is unconcerned with the substance of any of this, assuming, based on Mr. Goldberg's steady, rise-above-it-all attitude, that the substance is rotten fishy-headedness.

If only there were a mud-pit, where all contenders could work out these disputes in a sober and respectful manner. Oh, wait, there is! To the blogs at once!