Andromeda

Andy: Democracy, thank you for coming. Please have a seat and we can begin.

Democracy: Sorry. Can't. On the march.

Andy: Huh, what? I have to do the interview running alongside you?

Democracy: Yeh, of course. If I was willing to do a sit-down, don't you think I would have gone to someone popular and mousy-looking?

Andy: Giblets on Fafblog?

Democracy: I was thinking of Katie Couric, but him, too.

Andy: Nice boots. Are they --?

Democracy: Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're jack-boots -- I suppose you're going to warp and twist and warpy-twist that into something "significant"!

Andy: No, no, of course not. That would only apply to "thugs." So you can let go of my collar now, I'm choking.

Democracy: Oh, I didn't notice.

Andy: Could we march a little more slowly? Some of me is out of breath and all of me is fat!

Democracy: Sorry, can't slow down. IEDs, snipers, ....

Andy: So are you "on the march" or "on the run"?

Democracy: That's nuance. I don't do nuance.

Andy: Now, previously it was only freedom that was on the march. Now, it's democracy on the march, too. What up with that?

Democracy: Look, I signed up for a weekend a month! And I end up marching all over the place. My hitch ends, but they got this thing called stop loss. And let me tell you something about jackboots: they're good for standing in -- for about thirty seconds. I got corns on my blisters!

Andy: Whoa, whoa, whoa! I don't need to hear all this. I was told this was going to be a fluffy, optimistic, "Dr. Phil" style interview!

Democracy: Ya wanna know if I spank?

Andy: Again: whoa, whoa, whoa! I know it gets lonely, but I don't need to hear all the details. Just tell me this. Where are you going after you and Freedom get done marching all over Iraq?

IED Explodes.

Democracy: Get down, get down!

Andy: This is no time for dancing. Besides, I just wet my pants. From behind. I gotta go.